Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD).

What, you ask, in God's name, is ADHD? 

Well, you know how James Bond had a license to kill? In the same way, ADHD, awards the sufferer the ultimate gift.

The gift to be legally random.

When I say legally random, it kind of reminds you of Legally Blonde, doesn't it? Reese Witherspoon, with her Chihuahua, pretending to be a rich, perky, lawyer?

Not that I'd ever watch chick-flicks. I mean, thats girly bullshit. I drown kittens in my free time.

..Anyway, back to the point.

Have you ever noticed the kid, at the back of you class, who always looks like he needs to pee? Mostly likely, he does. But sometimes, he might also suffer from ADHD, that causes his lack of focus, or occasionally, the ability of control his bladder.

These kids, are also the kind who will CONSTANTLY try to ask out the hottest girl in the class. Yes, that girl, who spends all her life, in a tanning salon, to attain the perfect carrot complexion. 

Just FYI, girls, if your skin-tone reminds a person about the time his cousin ate a whole bag of carrots, then barfed the carrots, which then, the fucking dog ate and barfed into your fucking lap, it is NOT a good thing.

DAMMIT. I got off-track, again. I do this a lot. 

NO. I do not have ADHD. I have the curse of superior intellect. For example, one minute I'm like Come on, brain! Focus on getting off at the correct stop! and my brain like, BWAHAHAHAHA NO IMMA STARE AT CREEPY GUY LISTENING TO SELENA GOMEZ, then it goes on the singing some rock song, and before I know it, I've missed my stop.

Fucking hell, I got off track again. 

Fuck you, superior intellect. Fuck you.

Aaaaanyway. The lack of attention may also cause one to constantly switch from one topic, to another. The sufferers may get bored of talking about the same thing for too long, which may, occasionally, and especially if you're a guy, cause your girlfriend to stomp your feet, pour the coke down your pants, and walk out the movie theater. 

It may also give her an excuse to bitch about why you weren't listening to her crying about the last thing her now dead grandmum said to her. For the next few life times.

I might have gotten off track again. The stupid doctor says that I too am a victim of the horrifying disease.

But what does she know? She wears the same clothes everyday and her hair smells like sanitizers. 

Where was I going with this?

I don't even know.